急求英語經(jīng)典笑話(小學(xué)水平)

The New Teacher



George comes from school on the first of September.



"George, how did you like your new teacher?" asked his mother.



"I didn't like her, Mother, because she said that three and three were six and then she said that two and four were six too....."



新老師



9月1日， 喬治放學(xué)回到家里。



"喬治，你喜歡你們的新老師嗎?" 媽媽問。



"媽媽，我不喜歡，因為她說3加3得6, 可后來又說2加4也得6。"



Two Birds



Teacher: Here are two birds, one is a swallow, the other is sparrow. Now who can tell us which is which?



Student: I cannot point out but I know the answer.



Teacher: Please tell us.



Student: The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow.



兩只鳥



老師: 這兒有兩只鳥，一只是麻雀。誰能指出哪只是燕子，哪只是麻雀嗎?



學(xué)生:我指不出，但我知道答案。



老師:請說說看。



學(xué)生:燕子旁邊的就是麻雀，麻雀旁邊的就是燕子。



Excuse for Speeding



Excuse for Speeding

Harry and Lloyd were speeding down the road. A police car pulled them over.



〃Why on earth were you driving so fast?〃 the policeman yelled.



〃Our brakes are no good-so we wanted to get there before we had an accident!〃



超速的理由



哈里與勞埃德超速行駛，一輛警車攔住了他們。



“你們?yōu)槭裁撮_那么快?”警官喊道。



“我們的剎車不好，因此我們想在發(fā)生事故前趕緊到達(dá)目的地。”



Send the Bill to My Father



Doctor: 〃I can do nothing for your complaint. It is hereditary.〃



Patient: 〃then send the bill to my father，please.〃



把賬單給我父親



醫(yī)生:“對你的抱怨我無能為力。那是遺傳病?！?br>


病人:“那請你把賬單給我父親吧?！?



小建議:

英語笑話通常都是很短的，要是長了就達(dá)不到效果了。越是經(jīng)典的就越短。老外的幽默和我們的不一樣的。十句以上都可以算作閱讀段了，怎么表演啊，聽眾本來聽英語就費勁，句子又多又長，肯定沒興趣了，還是找些短的來表演吧，BODY LANGUAGE 到位，EXPRESSION 到位就OK了。